New Years Gone Awry
by Ikaru Kakou
Summary: Darkrai brought the drugs to Entei and Raikou's New Years Party at their request. But when things get out of control at midnight, he swears off of dealing drugs forever. Oneshot with drug use written because of an inside joke about legendary pokemon.


**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except for my ideas. Oh, and the fan fiction itself.

**A/N:** Any mention of acid in this fic is in reference to the drug LSD. Also, much of the fic mentions drug use. Hence the high rating. Also, for most of the fic references to Celebi will say Celebitch.

**New Years Gone Awry**

It was New Years Eve. As Raikou and Entei's dealer, I had been invited to their party for the sole purpose of providing everyone with drugs and getting Suicune to at least drink some alcohol.

So as I flew through the shadows of Olivine City, I was weighed down by several pounds of drugs of all sorts. Any human who saw me was instantly put to sleep by a Dark Void specially designed to make them forget the whole night. Any pokemon that saw me was subject to having acid shoved at them. After all, what need do I have for money? I'm a pokemon that puts things to sleep as a part of my job description. If I really want anything, a Dark Void serves the purpose of incapacitating anyone trying to stop me from getting it. As it was, that was how I got most of these drugs. Humans are so easy to steal from.

Reaching the base of the lighthouse, I spent a few seconds taking it all in. It was ingenious, really, to put the Olivine Legendary Safe House below the lighthouse. It granted us a lot of amenities we usually wouldn't have. Satellite TV from the satellite we put on the roof of the lighthouse (Which results in the best reception in town, by the way). Minutes away from any restaurant we chose we wanted food from (Order it from the lighthouse and then someone turns into a human to pick it up). Even electrical access for free, and since we were stealing it from the lighthouse, the city had to foot the bill. Serves them right for demolishing the old one by the beach in order to put up their stupid Battle Tower. Not to mention their attempts to keep strays out of the city.

As I lifted up the rock covering the entrance to the tunnel that lead to the Safe House, I managed to hurl another Dark Void at the guards in the lighthouse. Apparently there were always people trying to graffiti the tower, so the guards were there to stop them. _Not like it helps,_ I thought as I went into the tunnel, _Apparently Freddie Hall got past them long enough to spray paint his undying love for Arianna Jackson on the side._

Upon reaching the door, I knocked once. Several different slots opened on the door for eyes to look through. After trying several of them, a pair I recognized as Entei's found the one at my eye level.

"Password?"

"'Suicune needs to get drunk.'"

"Come on in."

The door opened and I found myself in the middle of the party. Somehow I wake up, steal the drugs, and head right over, and the party still looks like it's been going for hours already. Whatever. I pulled out all the drugs and sorted them on the table with a placard on it reading "Reserved for the drugs."

As the night drew on, legendaries continued to come in the door. Even Articuno decided to stop by. Almost everyone proceeded to go through the various stages of being drunk, stoned, or high. Eleven forty-five came and suddenly a thunderbolt arced up to the ceiling. Thank Mew for the rubber. Literally, it was his idea to put it in once Raikou decided to take up permanent residence here. Well, that and the incident where Zapdos and Ho-Oh got into an argument over Ho-Oh's cooking. As everyone turned towards the source of the thunderbolt, a rather high-looking Raikou was to be found standing on the kitchen table, one foot raised above the others due to the fact that he was using it to pin Celebitch to the table. How he got invited was beyond me. But back to the point, Raikou appeared to be about to make an announcement. As everyone got quiet, he began to speak.

"Now, before we turn on the TV to watch the ball drop in Saffron, which I'm sure we're all very sorry to not be able to see personally this year, I'd like to thank a couple people. First of all, I'd like to thank Deoxys for bringing the booze."

"Mmm… cosmic booze…." Articuno interrupted.

Raikou glared at Articuno before continuing. "Next, I'd like to thank Darkrai for supplying us with drugs up to our eyeballs." I bowed slightly as everyone turned and applauded. Obviously Suicune and I were the only sober ones there. Raikou continued his speech for quite a long time, surprising considering how high he was. By the end of it, nearly everyone was just waiting for him to finish so we could turn on the TV.

"…Now could someone turn the TV on? The countdown starts in ten seconds." He finished. Azelf, who happened to be floating be the remote, picked it up and turned the tube on. Immediately, Kanto Action News Reporter Gabby Takamaro appeared on the screen saying something about the countdown being just about to start. The view switched to the ball, which had begun its descent. The sound of people counting down filled the room.

"TEN. NINE. EIGHT." Pokemon began picking up (Or levitating in some cases) various champagne flutes, beer bottles, wine glasses, and various drugs.

"SEVEN. SIX. FIVE. FOUR." Suicune was pressured into accepting a champagne flute from Celebitch.

"THREE. TWO. ONE." Glasses and drugs were raised.

"ZERO! HAPPY NEW YEAR!" Glasses clinked and were then chugged.

And then the chaos began.

First, Suicune collapsed, apparently more drunk than anyone else after only a mouthful of champagne. Her unconscious form was dragged off to a bedroom and a bucket was placed under her head to catch any barf.

Then Entei did another line of crack before going crazy and jumping into the TV. Not onto, into. The severe electrocution knocked him out as his nose began to bleed from doing too much crack. He was rushed to the pokemon center run by a Blissey in the Safe House. He woke up three days later to a mourning sister and the third thing.

The third thing was the worst imaginable thing for anyone at the party. Raikou, caught up in the celebrations, had decided to do _all_ the acid that was left. Considering that not that many people at the party had had acid, this was almost a full sheet of it. This, of course, led to numerous things. First, Raikou began to breath heavily. Electricity began shooting in all directions from him, uncontrollably. Pokemon ran into other rooms, screaming their heads off, as Raikou just stood there. His breathing grew faster and faster until suddenly he collapsed. The electricity stopped flowing from him. He was dead.

The next day we held Raikou's funeral in the burned down tower in Eckruteak City. No mention of the previous night was made. It was a silent event marked only by the tears shed by everyone and a few hushed conversations afterward. As Entei was still unconscious from jumping into the TV, the only family member present was a very hung over Suicune. She cried inconsolably for most of the time. Afterwards she was escorted by Celebi, Latias, and Latios to the Safe House in Olivine so she could be with Entei.

After the funeral, I swore never to bring drugs for anyone to anything ever again, having already sworn off of using them myself after the day I first used acid with Raikou. The thought the he continued to use it, eventually leading him to his death, while I swore off of it brought tears to my eyes. I fled to the shadows after the funeral and only associated with the other legendaries when my services as a legend were requested.


End file.
